To my “I do what I want with who I want” girls. To my “I don’t belong to nobody, nobody owns me” girls. To my “I’ll have dinner with him tonight, go shopping with a different him tomorrow and actually have sex with a different him tomorrow night. I own my body I’m nobody’s property” girls.
I’ve been in your shoes, meaning, your current mindset. I know that in this season of your life you feel liberated, but as a woman standing on the other side of the freedom you desire, I’m here to gently tell you, you’re not free yet. I understand that we all have different walks of life. There’s no handbook on how to do this thing with precision. In this blog space, any talks related to sex will always be done with sensitivity and free of judgement.
I’ve been where you are. I’m here to tell you, being fluid and justifying promiscuity is false liberation. False liberation is the illusion of choice, superficial changes, cultural pressure, temporary relief or a lack of authenticity, among other things. When we’re done with the act, the pain of what we’re attempting to escape is still there. That’s why we feel the need to drink, smoke or get high to “let go of our inhibitions”. That’s why our frequency of sexual encounters increases. It’s also why some of us over eat. We need temporary pleasure to escape the pain. The pain being stress, anxiety, isolation, abandonment or the impact of abuse. The deceptive nature of this mindset is,
We’re packing on more shame and regret in our attempt to escape a pain that will only heal when we turn around and face it.
I’ve used the word “we” because I’m not above the message conveyed today. I don’t want you to feel demonized or alone.
A lot of you are going through a faze of self exploration, learning what you like and don’t like. I challenge you to consider the spiritual implications of your actions. I don’t have a heaven or hell to put you in. Again this is a judgement free space. Consider the exchange beyond physicality. What are you picking up from these people? Are you familiar with soul ties? They’re not only created through sex. Are you familiar with covenants? More over, have you sat with yourself introspectively to analyze why you’re exploring sex this way specifically?
You’re allowing too much access to the most vulnerable parts of yourself. You’re entertaining people who are not worthy of you nor are they who God intended for you. Trust me. Your healing is on the other side of the memory you’re afraid sit with. Your healing is on the other side of the isolation you’re afraid to sit in. You’re healing is on the other side of the pain your afraid to feel because fear told to you you wouldn’t recover from it. I’m here to tell you,
with God, you can recover from anything.
I’m sorry that you have to go through the process of healing but, you have to do this. Your breakthrough is on the other side of the emotional pain you’re trying Numb. You have to reveal it. You have to feel it. Allow God to heal it. And let it pass. Over time the memories won’t sting as much. Take it day by day. Continue to bloom.
Affirmations
I am valuable.
I am valued.
I am worthy.
I am free to change.
I am rare.
God made me in His image and likeness.
I am beautiful.
I deserve true intimacy.
I am respected.
I respect myself.
I forgive myself.
I am wise with my time, mind and body.
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